The Power of Prioritising Yourself: Navigating Mum Guilt, Shame, and Judgment

Listen up, mamas!
We need to talk about something that's been weighing on your minds: feelings of guilt, shame, or judgment for putting yourselves first. As mothers, we're often expected to put everyone else's needs before our own, but it's time to change that narrative. In this blog post, I'll share my three key Tips for navigating those negative feelings and how you can start to create change.

1. Prioritising yourself isn't selfish, it's necessary.

Let's get one thing straight - taking care of yourself isn't selfish, it's necessary. You can't pour from an empty cup, so prioritising your own needs and wellbeing is crucial. One of my clients, let's call her Sarah, used to feel guilty whenever she took time for herself. But after months of feeling exhausted and overwhelmed, she realised that she needed to make self-care a priority. She started small, taking just a few minutes each day for herself, and gradually built up from there. By prioritising herself, she was able to show up as a better mother and partner.

TIP: Prioritising yourself is essential to maintaining your mental and physical health, and it's not selfish to do so. As a result, you'll be able to show up as a better mother and partner.

2. You don't have to do it all alone.

As mothers, we often feel like we have to do everything ourselves, but that's simply not true. It's okay to ask for help from your partner, family members, or friends when you need it. In fact, having a support system is essential to maintaining your own well-being. My neighbour Jess recently became a new mum, and she was struggling to balance the demands of motherhood and her job. She felt guilty asking for help, but eventually she realised that she couldn't do it all alone. She started asking her partner to take on more household tasks and parenting responsibilities, and also reached out to a mom's group for support. Having a support system made all the difference in her ability to prioritise self-care.

TIP! Asking for help and building a support system is key to maintaining your own well-being. It's okay to ask for help when you need it.

3. Set boundaries and learn to say no.

In order to prioritise yourself, you may need to set some boundaries with others. This can be tough, especially if you're used to putting everyone else's needs before your own, but it's important to remember that it's okay to say no to things that don't align with your priorities. There was a time when my kids were young, I used to feel like I had to say yes to every social invitation that came my way. But after feeling burnt out and overwhelmed, I soon realised that I needed to start setting some healthy boundaries to conserve my energy. I started saying no to things that didn't align with my priorities, and it made a huge difference in my ability to prioritise self-care and focus on the things that mattered most to me.

TIP! Setting boundaries and learning to say no can help you prioritise self-care and focus on what's most important to you. It's okay to say no to things that don't align with your priorities.

So think it's time to shift the narrative and start prioritising ourselves. By remembering that prioritising yourself isn't selfish, building a support system, and setting boundaries, you'll be able to show up as the best version of yourself for your family.

So, mamas, it's time to prioritise yourselves and start thriving!